Diogenes said that, and he was right.  Every person’s experience is created internally, by him or herself.  No one outside of you can tell you what anything means, or whether you are ‘hurt’ or not.  If you feel hurt by something or someone, it is the result of your decision to feel that way.  This may be tough to hear, but it is true.  You can change your mind at any moment about how something is affecting you.
Quote from Neale Donald Walsch

Do you ever should on yourself or others?  Catchy way to become aware of a very common word, eh?!  We do it all the time.  We say ‘I should have’ or ‘they should’ or many variations of it.  STOP IT!  That is a very detrimental word!  It does not help anything, and puts immediate judgment on ourselves or others.  If we ’should have’ then we didn’t do it well enough?  Or if ‘they should’ then we are judging that they are not doing it right or good enough?  Ick!  Can you see that this can be harmful to our mental health?  Become aware of when/where/how often you do this and work on taking that word OUT of your vocabulary?!  (And BTW–once you start noticing it in your own vocabulary, you will be AMAZED at how often we all say it without thinking)!

Ever thought about that?  From the moment we meet others, we are teaching them what is acceptable to say to us, to do to us and how to treat us.  Since this is a very powerful statement to fully take in, I am not going to go into too much detail.  I think it is fairly self-explanatory.  I will say though, as hard as it may be to hear, the good news is that just as you may have unconsciously taught them to treat you, now that you are consciously aware of this, you have the power to change it!  So, go for it!  Look at the results in your life, how others DO treat you and begin slowly but surely teaching them a better way to treat you!

No one or nothing outside of us has to change for us to be happy.  I fought this concept for years, thinking that ‘if only’ this person, that thing would happen I would finally ‘get’ happiness.  I knew this concept, intellectually understood this concept but still was fighting to have circumstances and relationships RIGHT before I could be happy.  So, if this seems foreign to you or you don’t agree or don’t get it, I understand!  But, if you want to give it some serious thought, it really is true to the core!  WE are responsible for our happiness under any and all circumstances.  No one has to change, we do!  As we work through our own issues or problems, the ones that we thought THEY had to change seem to disappear!  For instance, if someone is too needy in my life, I think they need to get ‘fixed’ so they will leave me alone, back off, etc, right?  Well, what if it is MY problem to correct for myself.  What if MY boundaries are not in very good shape, and my needs are being trampled on because I need to be more clear, worry less about how they will react if I tell them what I need?  Hopefully this simple example helps you get the bigger picture.  What if I think I have to get that big promotion and THEN I will be happy?  What is behind my drive, my need for the promotion?  That won’t ever make me truly happy until I realize and deal with the feelings behind it: something like ‘others will be impressed and accept me more if I make more money,’ or ‘my family can be financially stable then, but not until then.’  Get the point?  Those things are NOT true!  You can have others accept you and create stability on many levels even if you don’t get that promotion.  But, we believe, truly believe to the bone that things have to change for us to be happy, don’t we?  Well, take another look.  That gives a LOT of power to things outside of yourself which you have no control over.  You can only control yourself, your responses, reactions and OWN happiness!

The Golden Rule tells us to ‘do unto others as you would have others do unto you.’  When we put ourselves in the position of the person we are directing our actions toward and treat them as we would want to be treated, the reaction will be synergetic and complementary.  When two people bring together their positive energies, the effect is enhanced.  Don’t respond to negative reaction with more destructive action.  When we do, the law of intertia takes over and we keep going down the path of negativity that can created a hell on earth.  We always reserve the right to say what we would like and why; we always give others a choice, and we always accept people as they are.  Trying to change others doesn’t work and is frustrating.  Ultimately, when we choose to act with love, and react with faith based upon the will of infinite wisdom, the results of our personal interactions will be beneficial to all concerned.  Our peace and poise will be in spiritual balance as we manifest the divine truth within.    Taken from Science of Mind magazine, December 2008 edition